I attended my first happy hour event with some of my fellow teachers. I enjoyed the change of scenery, while still being with these great people I've recently started working with. I think our happiness for happy hour was not just to get a drink and relax, but also to get out of that school and away from the people who seem to be sucking the life out of us (all those other people we work with and work for).
As the conversations shifted from one rant to the next, I fell into a conversation about how I'm not actually a teacher... Someone I worked with explained that having a college education doesn't necessarily make me a teacher, at least not in this school or neighborhood. He claimed that I (and other "teachers") come into this school with no idea about these kids. We show up and teach the things the DOE and whoever else tell us to teach, but we never quite teach them, at least not enough to rise above their positions in society.
He made me start thinking. (Although from the first point of his claim, I knew he was wrong. I am a teacher. Yes, I teach what I'm supposed to, but I actually come to teach more than the required subjects.) He is a man working in this school. He grew up in this neighborhood; he still lives in this neighborhood. He knows enough about these students from his work in the classroom, that he could possibly teach his own class. But, he can't, because he doesn't own the paper with the license or the degree for a college education to let him in. He pointed out, though, the future of these kids. Is anyone talking in a way that makes furthering their education after High School the direction these kids are headed? He compared the futures of these kids compared to those outside the city. What is the realistic future of kids outside this city? They are heading for college... And these kids? It doesn't even seem possible in their minds. Many of the boys look at prison as a way to prove they are a man.
How can this change? In my classroom, I can start by talking about these students' college experiences and sharing about what it will be like When they are in college. Already, I am constantly talking about how I still learn. These kids think learning stops when school is over... they don't understand that it is happening constantly, some of it naturally and some of it because I have the desire to continue learning.
Yet, these kids come from places that I don't understand. Right now, I can offer my encouragement and proof that it can be done. I went through college on my own. I worked to receive the support I could through scholarships and grants to help fund my education. I also took out plenty of loans, which I'll be paying off for quite a while. As much as I hate those loans, I love them. They are a constant reminder of what I have done for myself, what I have provided myself.
My next step is to continue to learn about these students and learn where they come from. I don't know what their lives are like outside the walls of the school. I don't know what it's like having a single parent bring you up in the Bronx. Or what it's like having a family of 5 live on $1,200 a month in this city. I couldn't do it by myself. How can I possibly know what to do for these kids? This leaves me begging them to teach me about their lives. Yet, can they? Can they make me understand what life is living in the projects or shelters? Can they make me understand the violence they see everyday that changes them, affects who they are and the choices they make? Can they truly make me understand the frustration they have with not only their lack of control but also the lack of control their parents have everyday?
I am a teacher. I teach what I have to teach. But everyday, I show up with a desire to teach more. I come into the classroom to work with these kids to be their encourager, supporter, influence, example, promoter, cheerleader... I can only hope that I can fuel something in these students to push them to learn and use their minds in a way that will give them more control of their lives and more options for the way they live.
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56 minutes ago
1 comments:
Your presence at that school is VERY important for those children, especially since you are so dedicated to them. Like my students, many of yours probably do not know about the world beyond their neighborhood. In the case of my students, they know about the five block radius that makes up their neighborhood, although most are unaware of a very large University that borders the northern edge of these five blocks. Some of them have been to faraway places like the Bronx or New Jersey to visit relatives. A select few have sampled a hot dog and ridden a roller coaster at Coney Island. They know about the existence of Mexico, the place that their parents left behind, but have never traveled there themselves. It is so easy for them to get caught up in the cycle of poverty that these neighborhoods and our society perpetuates. Share with them who you are and share the world with them. Help them to see that life is full of possibilities. We need to keep our children hopeful in the face of all the adversity.
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